Miss Manners: When visiting my dad at assisted living facility, is it okay to greet other residents?

"Miss Manners" Judith Martin

"Miss Manners" Judith MartinCourtesy Andrews McMeel Universal

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My father has moved into an assisted living facility, where residents each have their own rooms or small apartments. Some leave their doors open to the hallway, and I wonder if it’s appropriate to greet them when passing by their rooms as I visit my father.

They might appreciate a cheery “hello” or a wave from the hallway, but would that be intruding on their privacy? If I walk by with my eyes averted, am I sending a message that their presence is not important? What would Miss Manners recommend?

GENTLE READER: Is there an option between gawking at these tenants as you pass by and fervently looking away as though they were inmates who committed a crime?

Miss Manners suggests you try spontaneity and not overthink the situation. If you happen to make eye contact, a shy, endearing smile is fine. But if they do not return your gaze, keep it moving.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

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