Dear Abby: When I buy gifts for my fiancé, he looks them up to see how much I paid for them

DEAR ABBY: I am a giver by nature. This is how I show my love. I like to cook, knit, sew and buy gifts for the people who matter most to me. I have recently noticed that when I buy gifts for my fiancé, he looks them up to see how much I paid for them. He isn’t doing this to say I spent too little, but rather to say I spend “way too much” on him.

I consider what he’s been doing to be rude, and I told him so. I also told him it is none of his business how much I spent on him. Am I wrong? -- GIVING OF MYSELF IN ILLINOIS

DEAR GIVING: I think you overreacted by becoming defensive. Rather than scold your fiance because he chided you for spending the amount you have on his gifts, it could have been handled more delicately. All you needed to say was, “To me you are priceless. I get great pleasure when I find something I think you can use and will enjoy. Please stop looking a gift horse in the mouth.”

P.S. Make sure you are both on the same page regarding finances BEFORE you are married.

***

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.